First Love
Dear diary,
Day by day, it seemed like flying away. I cannot stop this. My
heart is always beating wherever I go. This feeling really makes me terrible.
Since two days ago, I realized that something wrong happened to me. Her beauty
looked interesting for me. Her face is likely recorded well in my mind during
this time.
I have never been this way before, I think that I have fallen in
love with her. I do not know what I should do. Whenever I close my eyes, there
is always her face in my imagination. She is very good to me. I know that I
have an feeling with her since the first sight.
She is my classmate in 8-A. In my eyes, she is very beautiful than
the others. Sometimes I imagine that I am able to get close with her. But I do
not know how I can do it. Maybe some day I will have a precise time to know her
more. About her hobbies and also her activities, I really want to know from
her. It sounds interesting.
Send it or not?
Dear diary,
Good news! Today is my lucky day. Definitely our teacher gave us a
chance to share our phone number for facilitating easy communication among students.
Fortunately, I can get her phone number. What a nice chance! This time, I only
have to be brave simply to send a message to her.
This is really a little bit difficult for me just to text her. I
spent two hours thinking whether I should text her or not. It is very
compicated. Perhaps I felt that it will be strange in the first only to greet
her. Finally I typed some sentences in my message. But it still could not be sent.
My heart cannot stop beating. Oh ... Allah I cannot handle this, this feeling,
I feel quite nerd to mean what I think. This really wastes my time.
I cannot wait anymore. If not today, then when? I sought some
reason why I should do this and why I should not do this. I cannot lie about my
feeling to her. But it seems like I feel stupid to think that I can approach
her. Alright, this is it. “Assalamu’alaikum” is the first word I typed. “Good
evening, my name is Andre, we are classmate in 8-A.”. I decided to dispatch
this message. I hope she will know me and then reply my message immediately.
Although I was seldom to talk with her at school, I believe that she does not
mind to have a chat with me.
Novel or story?
Dear diary,
I am very happy today. Because it is the first time I have met her
in the library. She greeted me when I was reading at the corner. Then she sat
next to me but I was too confused and shy to begin a conversation. Considering
that it is forbidden to talk each other when we are in library. So I continued
reading my preference book. That is history book. I like very much history, no
matter the kinds of history.
I looked at her for a while. She was thoroughly reading a book. I
tried to know what kind of book that read at the time. I supposed that she was
reading a novel or story, I could not see it clearly. So that, perhaps her
favorite book is literary book. But it is very general to conclude that. Maybe
I can ask her after leaving the library or I will text her after school. I
relly want to know what kind of book that she like. The important point is that
she likes reading.
I kept silent till the bell rang. The next lesson is awaiting us.
She directly raised and smiled to me then went out from the library first. I
could not go out together with her because I have to return the book I read to
its originally place. But it is good enough for me just to meet her in the
library and reading together. What a nice happening!
What’s up?
Dear diary,
As usual, this morning I went to school with my best friend, Dimas.
He is my best friend since we were at elementary school. He is very smart in
math and science. He is good-looking also I think. But at school, he is
registered in different class with me. He is in 8-C and I am in 8-A. So we are
not classmate. But I often visit him and invite him to go to some places out of
class such as to go to canteen or library. So that we cannot be apart just
because we are not in the same class.
There is something different with him today. I was thinking that he
was just feeling not well. But it seemed that he was alright and fine in the
outside. I really wondered what happened to thim. I asked him but he was just
saying that he is okay and I should not worry him at the time. However, I
cannot stop thinking and wondering about him.
Maybe, I was wrong to see him like that. I had to believe that he
was really alright and there was nothing to worry about. So, I preferred to
keep quiet. I hope that he will be okay and get normal again. In my eyes, he is
always cheerful and full of spirit wherever he is.
Late
Introduction!
Dear diary,
Step by step, I approached her through messages. I felt comfortable
with her as far as I undergo this relationship. I shared about my experiences and
she too. We can now get closer and closer. It was fun to know each other. But
still I cannot make even a simple conversation in class. I am too shy and
confused. I think it is definitely good for the beginning.
Sorry before, I forgot to let you know about her name definitely.
Her name is Dinda haniati. She was born in Cirebon, july 25th 1995.
She now live in Wanakarta village. As far as I know, she is very kind girl.
Polite and cheerful to everybody.
Because of those are mentioned above, make me think that she is
interesting. And I want to know more about her. Maybe I like her very much. We
are always talking about our personality and habitual activities everyday life.
What an
annoyance!
Dear diary,
Damn, I really annoyed today with one of my classmate. He is really
a naughty boy ever. He kidded me with a terrible prank. His kidding was not
funny at all. He hided library’s book that I borrowed three days ago. It is
very awful. Arrgh ... do you know? Because of that, the librarian got angry
with me. She accused me that I lost the book. However, I still cannot forgive
what was he done to me until now. You know what? He did that without feeling
guilty to me or my feeling. Ohh ... I really hate him.
Since that incident made me feel that I will not ever talk to him
again. I cannot make friend with him anymore. But I could not be in this way. I
know that as human, we have to forgive each other. Somehow, what was he done to
me cannot be accepted as the friend’s treatment. I feel confused and do not
know what to do with him. I only kept my mouth closed for him. I think it will
affect to him and make him realize that he has annoyed me.
If I still keep silent, maybe he will ask for sorry to me. I just
want him to do that. I can only forgive him that way. I do not really want to
break our friendship so far. I wish he will feel what I feel. Amiin.
I love you,
Mom!
Dear diary,
Oh no! I did not feel very good today. My body felt clumsy this
morning. I thought that I had a terrible fever followed with influenza and
cough. However, I really do not want to be sick today. Actually the indication
was seen since yesterday, but I could not realize that feeling. Now I feel
difficult to write and to do anything. Finally, I have a terrible headache and
heavy eyes. Ohh ... this is very irritating for me. So that, I do not think I
can go to school today.
My mother comes with some medicines and water. Warm water to drink
and to compress my forehead. She is very helpful even I do not talk to her that
I feel sick this morning. She really knows what I feel and what I need. She is
the best mother in this world ever I guess.
I want to recover my body as soon as possible, so tomorrow I can go
to school as usual. But my mother suggests me to write a letter to the teacher
today. She wants me to take a rest and not to go to school today. However, I
should do that because mother knows everything I need.
Talk to her
Dear diary,
I felt a little better today. I do
not know aboutthe lesson yesterday. Because I did not go to school but I went
to the clinic. Surprisingly, Dinda asked me about my condition this morning in
the class when break time. She initiated to talk with me. Definitely, I am very
happy that she was really care to me this morning. But it was really a short
conversation. I want to talk with her a little bit longer actually. She just
said that I have to take enough rest and keep my eat schedule then get well
soon.
During the lesson in the class, I
still feel dizzy to pay attention to the material and the teacher. I brought
some medicine to school for me myself to recover the body. I drank some when
break time. Maybe it was the effect that I felt dizzy while I was studying in
the class.
I really wanted to go home sooner.
However I cannot go home early because I still have some extra lesson after
this. I felt the time was running so slowly. It was about time that I worried.
But I felt happy since she began to talk with me this morning. I am really
really happy.
Borrowing her
book
Dear diary,
When the second bell rang this
morning, signed the breaking time, I initiated to start the talk with her. I
felt a little bit shy but I had to do that anyway. I was asked by the biology
teacher to borrow any one’s book in the class because I have passed the lesson
when I was sick several days ago. This is really difficult for me. I want to
borrow her book because I know that she is good in biology subject. I was
waiting for the right time to begin the conversation with her. She was
surrounded by her friends. It made me think about to get her alone.
The chance finally appeared to me.
Several minutes later, she was really alone. And I think it is the time for me
to start the talk. First, I said a thank to her because of her pray and wish
when I was sick. Then, I went to the point that I want to borrow her book
today. You know what? She simply smiled and gave her book to me directly
without doubt. She told me that it was really alright I borrow her book. I was
pleased and grateful to her. It convinced me that she is very kind and helpful
girl.
Time for math
Dear diary,
Time by time, we are getting closer
and closer. We often share and discuss about many things such as lessons,
hobbies, dreams, and everything through messaging or directly when we are in
the class. There is no problem about our relationship. She is really care to me
and I really appreciate it. I feel happy and I think she feels happy too. I do
not know whether I should say to her that I have fallen in love with her or
not. So I just go with this regardless of what I really feel to her. And I
prefer to enjoy this relationship whatever it is looked.
Everything is alright for me. If we
only have a good friendship. So I can approach her with my way, no matter what
happen to us. She is really smart in biology and even in math. Conversely, I am
lame in those subject. I think that I can learn them more with her. Then I can
do the best for my final test next week.
Tomorrow will be sunday and I have a
plan to learn together with some of my friends including her. I am really
interested because I can convince that I can pass the examination with the best
score. So that I will make her and also my friends proud of me.
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